Monday, October 18, 2010

Español and Peeves.

I think the fact that I am going to have to speak and understand Spanish is finally starting to settle in.  I can't decided if this revelation was due to the start of my Spanish class this week or due to me leaving in less that three and a half months.  As I'm watching the news on Univision, a direct correlation occurred.  The more the newscasters and reports spoke Spanish, the more my ego shrank.  I've never claimed to speak Spanish, but I've kind of always assumed that magically I would be able to pick up and understand the language. No. I was wrong.  Oh well, I guess all I can do is to keep studying.

I still have much to do in the preparation to leave.  I won't indulge you in all the details.  But can you trust me?  I'm not being dramatic.  It's all these tiny little details that zip around in my mind.  I've started to write some of them down.

I have a small favor to ask.  May I vent? I've always wanted to make a list including some of my pet peeves, but didn't want to come across as a bumhole.  Let's face it. It's a pretty bumhole thing to do, making a list of some of the things you hate about your fellow man. But dang it's fun!  These are in no particular order.

1. Talking while munching. We all do it.  The waiter asks us how our food is as soon as we shovel the first bite in to our mouths.  Politely swallowing or pushing the food to the side of your mouth in order to give a quick answer isn't what I am referring to.  Instead, I cringe inwardly when I'm subjected to an incomprehensible monologue that is muffled by the sound of food swarming on the palate.

2. Talking while yawning. This is closely related to the first. And I must say that I am probably guilty as well. Honestly, I probably don't even notice when I or another person does it..... as long as..... your speech is not affected by the distorted shape of your mouth.

3. Long, natural fingernails. Unsanitary and gross. The end.

4. Bad art. Just because you say you're an artist, does not make you one.  Same goes for writers and Christians.

5. Nasal talking. God gave you a mouth for a reason - use it wisely.

6. Acting like you know what you're talking about. This one is debatable.  Because I do hate it, but it's so funny to me, also. Even though it annoys the poo out of me, I do get some sick enjoyment of listening to someone lie, exaggerate, or stretch the truth straight to my face when I can see through the hyperbole.

7. Conversation Domination. This is a multifaceted flaw which includes but is not limited to: interrupting others, talking during a natural period of silence, commenting on EVERY comment, playing a word version of 'bigger and better,' story stealing, and creating irrelevant arguments.  #6 could also be included.

8. Facial piercings. Unless you are under 20 years old and/or in a punkrockin' band, TAKE IT OUT, pretty please, of course.  They were so 90's, and the 1990's aren't retro cool, yet.  Too soon, too soon.

I guess it can really boils down to me not liking unclear speech and ingeniousness. Does anyone else have any pet peeves? And you're not allowed to say "yeah, people who lists pet peeves." Ha!  Thanks so much for reading!  I hope you can empathize with me and not just think of what an insensitive jerk I am. ;)

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